


Isolation

by DarkMage13



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Mentions of alcohol, Oral Sex, Porn with Feelings, Rival Sex, Rough Sex, Unprotected Sex, implied depression, office rivals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-14 04:54:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29662053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkMage13/pseuds/DarkMage13
Summary: "You've already shown how much better you are than me. Now fuck me into submission."Still as a statue. His fingers reached for her bare knee."If you want."
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 14
Kudos: 83





	Isolation

**Author's Note:**

> Moodboard by the lovely [RedRoseWhite.](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedRoseWhite/pseuds/RedRoseWhite)

The alcohol, burning down her throat, made her libido dance.

For an hour or more, after Rey came to the swift conclusion that inhaling poison would not drown out the numbness, thus halting any further attempt at inebriation, she observed the pub's customers. Some couple with eighty-year-old age lines letting out giggles after foolishly downing Irish car-bombs sat in the corner. A few frats in tracksuits and white t-shirts threw off-target darts.

The one thing that bothered her whenever she drank, long after sobriety took over, like now, she was still horny to the point of pain. And she needed an outlet.

Her mind flitted to earlier, with _him_ and his burning gaze on her as she stood in the boardroom, clicker in hand, trying to name off statistics without falter.

A sip of water down her throat nearly caught on her windpipe at the _ding_ of the bell.

He, the man that strove to complete an analysis report an hour early of her, to score the essential meeting with a stubborn client before her, to be in his stacked office with all papers in black files and the blinds concealing the light of day all calm five minutes before the workday started, strolled in.

Rey suppressed a hiccup. It would be easy to seethe and sneer at this man, who topped her in every way save for one (a thought that shot from her brain to her soaked core.) A persistent lump in her throat, not formed by alcohol or bile from hunger, turned her seething into ashes.

Kylo Ren sat down next to her.

"Water. Ice." The tremor of his voice elicited a thrill that she loathed. Her libido did not fade along with the mildest of buzzes from earlier. Back against the bar, she considered what he was going to say next.

The bartender handed him a glass of water, frozen cubes clinking as he took a sip and looked at her. Molten amber.

"Your presentation was impeccable, Niima."

The soft tingle of her spine didn't lower her guard. "You're just saying that to make me feel better."

He leaned forward, and she felt very small. Smaller than going toe-to-toe with him in a boardroom. The co-workers brought snacks to witness the legendary matches between them, even the CEO.

"Then what would?" He asked, swirling the ice in his glass. His eyes penetrated her once more and her freckled cheeks were on fire. Despite how much she loathed him, in her own eyes and everyone else's, she just felt numb. Inadequate. His gaze seemed to lie.

One act of boldness in her lifetime.

"Your body," she answered. "You've already shown how much better you are than me. Now fuck me into submission."

Still as a statue. His fingers reached for her bare knee.

"If you want."

She ignored the ache in her chest. "I do." A beat. "Sober as an old man. Not the one in the corner."

No smile. No admission of enjoyment to her pathetic attempt of a quip.

A grasp on her wrist and she was tugged along through the pub, out into the crisp air. A shudder trailed down her back from the mist bearing down on her bare nape. The pads of his thick fingers seared her wrist. She almost recoiled. She _wanted_ to recoil. Her hand was in the fiery oven and she couldn’t pull it away, too enthralled by the flames consuming her. The danger didn’t alarm her as it should, perhaps it would, when she can wake up one day and not feel more than tensity in her shoulders and absence of zest.

“My place or yours?” he murmured loud enough for her, waving down a taxi.

“Mine.”

The bobble of his Adam’s apple led up to the next question. “Protection?”

A blink. “What?”

He didn’t look at her. “Do we need to stop at a convenience store or not?”

Ever the cautious, untrustful one, a _yes we need condoms_ would slip out of her mouth without a second thought. The actual sentence shocked her.

“No. If you want to, that is.”

His nod, lacking in any modicum of enthusiasm, had to do.

The taxi ride was as tense, Kylo keeping his glare outside in the misted night. His fingers danced across her thigh, inching closer to her soaked panties hidden underneath her black skirt. Rey choked on her gasp at the barest pressure on her skin. Any further and the tips of his fingers would have touched her lacy panties. 

His touch was yanked away by their arrival at their destination.

The walk to her fourth-floor apartment was unbearably silent. She wanted to say something, anything, but her ever-present anxiety and inadequacy to his everything kept her words from manifesting. It was so much easier in the office when it was far and closed off from anything intimate. Rey was out of her element (or she never truly was _in_ her element, his existence a gentle and persistent reminder).

Her still-chilled fingers trembled as she unlocked her apartment and stepped inside.

Kylo followed behind her. He closed the door, locking it.

The blighting panic at the _click_ overwhelmed her, and her heart went into overtime. Staring into his molten amber eyes, just as searing as his hold on her wrist and his tease on her upper thigh, Rey swallowed roughly. 

"How do you want to do this?" She breathed out. 

His hold on her got tighter. “No protection, right?”

“I’m,” words failed her for a moment, afraid he was going to reject her request even though they came all the way here, “I’m on birth control. To regulate my cycles, yes, but I am covered in that way.”

Tentative fingers reached up to her cheek and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. She thought her chest was going to cave on itself from the gesture. Even in this area of life, he knew what he was doing, knew all the right things to do to steal her breaths and shudder her knees. He was simply _better,_ and Rey was simply _there._ Couldn’t even seduce him in the proper manner.

Then she was hauled off her feet, into his arms. He cupped her supple ass beneath his wide palms, squeezing so firmly she gasped and expected fingerprints left behind when it was all over, when he left her, his essence dripping out of her to soil her cold sheets and she would weep because she was just _there._

He nuzzled her hair while carrying her, her legs wrapped around his waist. “Fuck you into submission, were your exact words, right?”

 _Use me,_ she thought. _Use me, because that’s all I’m good for._

“Yes,” she rasped when his teeth scraped along her pulse-point. “Please.”

“Hmm…” He plopped her without ceremony onto her bed, pinning her down by the wrists. All wind escaped her lungs. “You seem so submissive already.”

She wrinkled her nose. “Excuse me.” She strained her arms, but he was so strong. Stronger than her. Stronger than she will ever be. “Do you want me to fight you tooth and nail then?”

His hips ground into hers. The most unsexy squeak, like she was a little girl, slipped out. Her panties were still soaked from arousal earlier The tough threaded denim ground against her mound, the silk-paired-lace doing nothing to protect her aching sex from the pressure. 

“No. No, I don’t want you to do anything except… Be yourself. Let me take the lead.”

What did that even mean? That expression was never given to her except in preppy speeches given by motivational speakers who were compensated with a hefty check. Kylo said it as if it was all he expected of her. The issue lied in therein she had no idea how to _be._

“Don’t move, alright?” he asked, and it was so firm but… Low and gentle, as if he was giving her a secret promise. She nodded in turn. He released her wrist, the pads of his fingers brushing over her chest, down the flat plane of her stomach, only to go back up underneath her blouse. Her skin goose-bumped at the cool air in her apartment. His palm came to rest on top of her breast, squeezing what he could.

His mouth continued to lick at her neck, never going near her lips. She was grateful he didn’t; she wasn’t sure how she would deal with him ever kissing her. It was easier to let go when he didn’t even care enough.

At a kiss at the hollow of her throat, she moaned louder than she did so far. Her thighs gripped his hips, urging for more. More. _Don’t tease this out,_ she begged.

“Such a tease,” she hissed.

“I want you drenched for me, sweetheart,” he hummed, pushing her blouse up and reaching behind her to unclasp her plain white bra. Her shirt was gone by his hands, followed by her bra.

A pinch of her nipple and she yelped. In the lone nights when she lay in bed, thinking of him and how unattainable in friendship or romance he was, she would grope at her own tits. His hands were not dainty and thin like hers, they were anything but. Firm, calloused, thick. Her back arched into his hands, wanting her breasts lavished till they were abused red.

“Your tits are so sensitive,” he said with mild surprise. He kissed her throat one more time, trailing his pink lips down the crest of her chest, still pulling, tweaking, massaging.

Rey blinked back the tears. So this was how pleasure was received? Keeping her on the edge, begging for more, being so greedy in a world where she couldn’t be.

Kylo’s lips arrived at the lining of her skirt. He didn’t hesitate to flip her skirt up and lick a hot trail over her panties. The act wouldn’t set her cheeks aflame, she would think, but it was how he kept his molten eyes on her throughout the act that made her almost delirious with heat. 

His hand was still on her breast. A nimble thumbing of her panties aside, and he was already devouring her. He was giving by taking. Licking and kissing her cunt like he was dying of starvation, wringing keens and cries from her throat and chants of “Kylo, Kylo, Kylo, oh god Kylo more…”

She grabbed his hair, intertwining the silk strands between her fingers. Her only opportunity to do what she fantasized about. He stroked soft circles around her cilt and she gripped tighter.

Right on the precipice, Rey tried to contain herself, tried to withdraw the same way she felt too obnoxious in the company of others, not wanting to be embarrassing or loud or _unappealing._ But, she couldn't contain it. She fell off.

She screamed. Thighs convulsing. Cunt clenching on nothing but an eager tongue. 

Limp against the sheets, she felt Kylo move away from her sex with one last kiss to her folds. Rey would have been mostly content to remain here and drift off to sleep, but she asked for him to push her down and do what he wanted with her useful cunt. 

An audible smack of his lips. "You taste so good." The faintest of touches of his finger chased down her inner thigh, making her writhe. "I want to eat you out over and over. I want you to squirm under my tongue. I want you to beg me to relent in my lack of mercy as I eat you through orgasm after orgasm."

Rey clenched her thighs. Was it possible to be wetter from mere words alone?

Divesting her of her shoes, Kylo took care of her panties, tossing them away and setting her legs free. He kissed her thighs; for what reason, she did not know. All of his actions thus far made no iota of sense, save for the act of making her drenched.

He paused in his ministrations, looking at her. Rey felt more naked under his gaze than ever in her life. She wanted to crawl away, cover herself.

Kylo said nothing, opting to reach for her shoulder and roughly rolling her onto her stomach. Her skirt’s ruffles pooled over the backs of her thighs. She braced herself on the sheets, a hot thrill down her back to her cunt making her drip onto the bed. His hands tugged her skirt off of her. 

“As much as I want to use this as leverage,” he mused in her ear, “I want nothing covering you.”

Her breathing hitched.

The ruffling of clothes, the pull of a zipper, the loosening of a tie, were all that she could hear. Searing hands clapped on her buoyant ass, making her jolt. She bit her lower lip. Still embarrassed from her earlier cries, she had to suppress a moan.

The position they were in was perhaps too perfect for their situation. It wasn’t personal, nor intimate or loving. It was for one reason, to fuck her, to own her in the bedroom as well as the workplace. He dragged his palm down her spine, leaving cold fire in his wake.

Rey felt alive. Her blood was electric.

He pushed into her, slow and steady. Unnecessary.

The heat of his chest pressed into her skin. His hands roamed her shoulders, over her sides and palming her breasts. 

"You're so tight, Rey," his words licked at her ears. Each thrust served as punctuation. "So hot around my cock. Fuck."

Kisses were laid on her nape, on her hair, making this so personal. Even when he picked up the pace, slapping his hips against her ass, it was too intimate.

"Harder," she gasped out. "Harder."

 _Use me_.

He obeyed, latching his fingers into her locks and pounding her cunt. It hurt, it hurt so good. She felt something, she felt used and it felt _good_. 

But his kisses, his roaming hands, cut through the slight pain mixed with pleasure. She felt chilled to the bone, that he was treating her this way. He shouldn't. He _shouldn't._ But he was.

He hauled her up against his chest, still thrusting. Hand on her neck, he kissed her ear. "The day I first saw you I wanted to do so many things to you. I wanted to see your tits. Your pretty little cunt. The freckles on your shoulders."

She moaned, arching into him. His chest was so firm, solid. His arms equally so. He could carry the weight on her shoulders away if he wanted to. If she let him.

Rubbing circles in her hips, he tensed up on one final jerk of his hips, spilling his release into her with a groan. She did that. She got him to do that. For one moment, she reduced him down to only his pleasure. It was empowering, in a strange way.

He didn't move. She didn't move.

Reality settled in, creeping into her mind. Her sudden inadequacy, tearing all the pleasure and pain away and leaving her hollow. Her existence, marked by abandonment and friends all accomplished and wrapped up in their own lives, would continue on a drift through a grey, flat ocean. Kylo was a storm rolling in to tear at her sails for one night.

He pulled out of her, releasing his bruising grip on her hips. He lowered her to the sheets.

And this would be where he left her.

She squeezed her eyes shut, prepared for this moment, she told herself.

Instead, the covers came over her and a warmth nestled in, next to her. His ever-fiery touch rested on her hip, pulling her closer.

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go.

Her pulse quickened, despite how exhausted she felt, how swollen and sore she was between her legs. She opened her eyes and he was looking at her.

A lump formed in her throat. “Why are you still here?” The words came out so quietly, Rey wasn’t sure she uttered them.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” he said after a beat.

“I… I… I don’t know.”

She got up to use the bathroom. The closest she could to fleeing in her own apartment. When she came back, he was gazing at her, his hand out where her body once was.

With trembling hands at the covers, she climbed back into bed, allowing him to pull her close and she was being cuddled. A thumb at her jaw forced her to look at his face, dotted with little constellations and framed by wavy locks. Sex hair, tragically, looked even better on him.

“Rey,” he whispered before she realized what he was doing. He leaned in and kissed her lips.

Her eyes widened. Before she could respond, before she could even act, or even think, he pulled away from the softest of kisses.

“Just in case it wasn’t clear to you, Rey,” Kylo said, his voice hoarse. “You’re not beneath me. You’re worth more than you ever give yourself credit for.”

The tears stung her eyes, even as he pulled her over and held her against his chest.

Before she fell asleep, she whispered, “Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Be kind to yourself. 💖


End file.
